So I’m on a plane today in the bulkhead row (the reason that the location of my seat is important is, for those of you that do not know, bulkhead seats have tray tables that come out of the armrest rather than tray tables mounted to the chair in front because, well, there is no row of chairs in front of the bulkhead) and the flight attendant comes by offering drinks. I’m ready a book and listening to my iPod, but I have my tray table out, so I give my order and the flight attendant brings a can of soda and a glass of ice and puts them on my tray table. I’m vaguely aware when the flight attendant reaches across me and hands a glass of orange juice to the guy next to me. Suddenly my right leg is wet and I realize that the guy next to me had dumped his glass of orange juice onto my leg and all over my seat. Luckily the flight attendant was still next to my row, so he threw me a bunch of napkins and went to get me paper towels. The guy next to me is just sort of staring (yes, you can assume I am ok with the fact that he was not trying to reach into my seat and dry me off) at me, so I finally ask him to pick up the cup that is still dripping liquid on me and perhaps clean up the ice on my tray table that is melting and spilling more liquid on me.
I finally get all of the liquid cleaned up to the extent I can and realize that the rest of my flight is going to feel sort of like being in a wetsuit due to the non-absorbent properties of the seat cushion and the very absorbent properties of my cotton shorts. To his credit, the guy next to me did offer to buy me a drink, which I refused at 10:30AM, and then bought himself a drink, making me very happy that the orange juice had not been mixed with vodka when he spilled it on me.
The guy then asked me, while holding his new drank that I was keeping a very wary eye on, if my tray table was the only tray table for the row. It was at that point that I realized he must have been trying to fit his drink on my tray table when he spilled it; probably thought that I was monopolizing all of the tray table real estate for the entire row. I showed him his tray table in the arm rest, made sure that he put his drink towards the person in the aisle seat, and went back to my book.
If you can avoid it, I definitely recommend not sitting on a wet airplane seat. Further, if you do get stuck with a wet airplane seat, I recommend that the liquid substance not be sticky as sticky stuff is even less fun.